Rejected
by CyrahX
Summary: Before disappearing into the darkest of nights, he paused and whispered his last words to the man he loved. "I wish we'd never met."


**A\N:**

 **"God damn it, Cyrah, you've got other works to finish!"**

 **"I know, Cyrah, but I'm having so many new ideas and-"**

 **"What about your other OTPs, Cyrah?!"**

 **"I'm sorry, Cyrah, but... JayDick are just... and... I don't even know!"**

 **"..."**

 **... That's exactly the situation in my head right now!**

* * *

"I- I don't know what to say..."

"How about 'Me too'? Do you even have an idea how difficult this was for me?"

"I'm with Babs, Jason."

"I don't wanna hear it! I want you to _get_ it, Dick!"

Jason ran a frustrated hand through his hair and paced around the room until he halted in front of Dick once again.

"I'll say it again, okay? I love you. I fucking love you, ever since I saw your fucking face, alright?!"

"Jay..."

"No! Don't 'Jay' me! Did you know that my last thought when that maniac beat me to a bloody pulp was you? Did you know that this last thought took all my fear away, even when I knew I was _dying_?"

"Stop..."

"Listen!" Jason cut in much louder, then pulled a cigarette and a lighter out of his pocket.

"Did you know that no matter how mad the pit made me, all I could think of was getting back to you? That even my rawest survival instincts circled around you?!"

He let out a loud, shaky breath and lit the cigarette, then took a long drag,

"Of course you didn't."

He looked away now, and Dick could tell he was holding back tears.

"Jay, listen."

Dick took a step into Jason's private space. He probably shouldn't have done that, but closeness was his way to communicate trust.  
It made Jason look at him, confused.

"I feel it. I can feel your love for me, and I love you too - as my little brother. As my little wing. I _do_ feel it Jay, but I don't feel… _that_ _way_. I never have."

"Fuck you," Jason hissed before the tears fell through narrow eyes.

"Fucking fuck you, Dick. Fuck," he sobbed.

Dick's touch on his shoulder was soft, but Jason hated it.

"And I was dumb enough to think that your affection was only directed at me. Of course that's just you. Fucking slut!"

"I don't know what to say but I'm sorry- We're still family, and we'll always be."

"Save it! If I can't have you, I don't want anything from you!"

"Forgive me..."

"No, forgive _me_ , Dick. Forgive me for believing in something that would've made me happy for once."

"Maybe you only confuse something... I mean, maybe it's just brotherly love or best friends love or-"

"Would you want to fuck your brother, Dick? Do you dream about your best friend kissing you after you killed your worst nightmare and telling you everything will be alright, do you wake up screaming when you realized this wasn't real?!" Jason was shouting by now.

"Fuck, Dick - how can I make you understand that you're so much more than my friend or brother?! I love you like the person I wanna _die_ with. But you don't get that, or you don't wanna get that!"

"Jason," Dick only whispered by now. It hurt to hear those desperate words Jason's heart was shouting out at him.

"I'm touched. I mean it. And if I was... _that way_ , maybe I would've loved you back, because you're a wonderful person. But... I'm so sorry..."

Jason's emotion brought Dick near to tears as well. He couldn't raise his voice above that rasp it had become.

"Let's stay friends. Let's stay family. Please. I need you to stay with me, okay?"

"Stay with you just to see you be happy, get married, have children - everything with _her_ instead of me - and I have to watch? No thanks. I'm out, Dick. If you let me leave like that, you'll never see me again, I hope you know that."

"Jay, don't do this. Why leave behind all those persons who love you and care about you just for one stupid man?"

"Because that stupid fucking man is the only one worth living for, the only reason worth changing for. Without that man there's nothing left to hold me in this goddamned place and its goddamned rules."

He gave Dick one last look that truly showed him how he felt; those piercing blue-green eyes were full of sadness and hurt, full of anger, slowly losing their passion and becoming more and more lifeless, before he put on his domino and turned his back to Dick.

"Go to Babs and your happiness. Don't follow me, don't look after me, because the next time we'll meet you won't like what you see. I can promise you that." Jason walked to the window and started climbing out of it. Before disappearing into the darkest of nights, he paused and whispered his last words to the man he loved.

"I wish we'd never met."

He hopped out of the window, leaving behind a speechless and deeply affected Dick.


End file.
